Term 4 Written Language

WALT write a character description of a person we know very well.

We know we have achieved this when we …

-    have written about the person’s physical appearance (the way they look).

-    have written about the person’s behaviour (how they speak or act).

-    have written about how they affect other people (what do they do to make you notice them).

-    have written about the person’s environment and belongings.

-    used descriptive words to make a picture in the mind of the reader

My Mum by Jesse Varney

Mum has long brown hair, blue sparkly eyes and a grey smooth shiny necklace. Her name is Wendy. She is quite tall. She has long brown hair and blue sparkly eyes. She also has a brown-green necklace. She has white smooth skin. She carries me to bed every day. She gives me a kiss and I like it. She likes pretty clothes and pretty hats. She has plants in her garden and I like to eat the strawberries.

Feedback:

You have tried to use some good descriptive words in your writing and tried to create a picture in the mind of the reader.

Next Steps:

1.    Before conferencing with the teacher, you need to do some editing and check your work so you do not miss out any words that you need and also to make sure your story makes sense.

2.   Try to change the lengths of some sentences by using some conjunctions (joining words) and begin your sentences in different ways.

3.   Add more details – see the WALT criteria.